Well everyone... this place has been truly quiet and the lights have been dim. I think my faith is still strong, but I'm not really much for writing about it. I have moments where I don't really pray or read much, but I still believe. I still have faith. I am actually feeling really blessed and grateful to God right about now. This year's Novena came and went. I didn't participate this year much. I went to a couple of Masses. I didn't take photographs nor walk in the processions. I was feeling a bit edgy and anxious and not like my normal self.
Anxiety and stress have come calling in my life and I'm working through them the best I can. I need to return to my workouts and my writing, but lately, I haven't had much desire to do those things. I see the light at the end of the tunnel and I don't think I'm seeing things as dim as I had been, but my life has changed a lot in a year. Honestly, the changes in my life are for the good, but they don't come without stresses, worries and fears. Not only do I have worries of my own, I worry about my parents. My dad is struggling with health issues. He and my mom fight and argue. I get caught in the middle. Dad has some financial worries about a tenant of ours, but as the economy recovers, I believe the tenant will be more financially stable. I'm in a relationship that is serious. He proposed last Saturday. I worry about him, just because I love him so much.
I remember praying to the Blessed Mother for her intercessions last year. I truly felt like I was going to have to accept living a single life and all that came with that life. I honestly didn't believe that there was anyone out there for me. That Novena ended late, nearly in July, and three weeks later, the man I'm going to spend my life with, sent me a facebook friend request. I didn't think of it then. He was an old classmate from high school wanting to reconnect as facebook friends.
I tried to make the novena and offer thanksgiving for answered prayers. I believe he was sent by God. It's the only time in our lives when we could be together. We've talked about that and we know this time is our time. We both feel the presence of God in our lives and I need to remember that God is always there. That when things get frustrating or overwhelming I can turn to Him for strength. I also have a wonderful and beautiful man to lean on now. I am very blessed and those are the things I need to remember when things get bad.
I know where the stresses come from and they tend to overwhelm me sometimes. I also need to find a full-time job come fall. I'm hoping to be hired as a teacher's assistant or a sub with the archdiocese this fall. I could always go back to real estate. So, if you're still out there reading, thanks. Keep me in your prayers too.
